Hi Everyone,

Well, my surgery date is quickly approaching!!! (One week from today!)

I'm jazzed and nervous!

Food has been the focus of my life for years, embarrassing but true, I'm wondering how it will be not to have it?

I mean I really want the surgery and I have taken so many preparation classes but I'm trying to get my mind around how it will be without food.

Does that sound weird?

I'm afraid that I'll feel like taking to my bed with nothing to live for - depressed and overwhelmed by life!

I bit melodramatic perhaps - but the thoughts lurk in the back of my mind.

What is it really like?

Darien

Darien...for me, afterwards I began eating to live, not living to eat. If anything, I should have focused more on food and done more research like you have, so I would make healthy choices, and not ignore eating until I was SO hungry that I ate whatever what was on hand..most of the time getting sick by it. You have all the information, you have done all the prerequisites, YOU have done the work. Take a deep breath and relax sweetie. Food really does take a back burner to living life...and LIFE is the best part! I find that now...2+ years out, I don't miss food...and when I do, I cook or bake for my family...and that generally alleviates that urge.

On another note...one more week?!?!?!?! YAY! Congrats! Shall we dance?

Everything you are experiencing is normal. This is how we have lived our life and there is no way to imagine the other side. I kind of liken this to childbirth - there is no way to describe it to someone else. You have to experience it for yourself to really believe it is true.

Not experiencing hunger still surprises me. The fact that I can live - WELL - on less than 1000 calories a day - still surprises me. I never would have thought these things possible until I experienced them myself. You are about to embark on a wonderful journey. Have faith - you are about to be amazed!

Well, I'm looking at a handsome little boy wrapped up in your arms...I think that he is someone to live for. Hoping that you will discover soon that YOU are worth living for. You have much to give to this world and by taking the pounds off, you will last longer to share your talents.

I never mourned the loss of my food...because I have not given it up. Sure, it took a long time before I could eat a piece of pizza again, but that was okay with me. All good things are worth waiting for. You have waited to have this surgery...it's a good thing.

I went thru a period of mourning food, but you can get past that pretty quickly and really start to live for and enjoy other things. You have to take ownership of your feelings and take responsibility for how you react to things. You have to stop and listen to yourself and ask yourself, what is making me want to medicate with food and what else can I do about it? It really makes to take better care of yourself. You will be fine and we are all here cheering for you! Don't let us go, we won't let you go!

Darien, sweetie, YES you can live without comfort foods....in the beginning it is fairly easy to make those choices but later on when the "honeymoon" phase is over you still have a CHOICE ....and with all the research and preparation you have done I believe you will find other things to do, once the weight starts coming off, that food, comfort or not, will become 2nd or 3rd or even 10th on the important things to do/stress about list.

You are so much more prepared than I ever was and I have made tremendous lifestyle changes and still need to make adjustments....yes I slip occassionally, but usually NOT without thought and you are equipped &will be able to do the same. Remember wls is a LIFETIME commitment, and it is a process as well as an event. You are going to do great! Sit back and enjoy the ride!!!! I understand it's scary and to be perfectly honest, I was scared too, but as long as you have already made up your mind to chose the best for your health, you will be able to do this....

You just keep coming back here as often as you need to and we will be here to cheer you on!

Blessings!

Darien, don't be afraid. I'm here to tell you loudly and clearly that you are about to enter the best relationship with delcious food that you've ever had. NO you will NOT be eating thousands of calories a day, but you will enjoy food much more from now on. You'll never take it for granted again and you will not need tons of comfort food to help you through life.

You can do this, and you will love it. This new life is the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me, and I think it will be for you too.

Don't be afraid. We're all here on this side waiting for you.
Best hugs.

The ladies who have already posted have said it far better then I ever could. This is going to be a great adventure for you. Trust me it is worth & yes you can live without comfort food. I mourned the loss of food after my surgery. It was hard. But, I wanted it and I stuck with it and you really don't crave stuff. I love vegatables now. It is bizarre and amazing.

Hugs.

Just remember to breathe!

Thank you all so much!
You brought tears to my eyes!
I am so grateful for your words of encouragenent!
I feel much better now! Ready to go!
Darien

Hey Darien,

Think about it in this way....you are going to be taking in fuel like a fine racecar now. Everything you put into it must be of the finest ingredients to keep it running at a fine tuned pace.

It's like the Loreal commercial... You are worth it. Every bite now counts so remember that you are worth each detail it takes and how lucky you are that you don't have to settle for a lot when only the best is good enough for the new you!!!

Hope that visual helps... it helps me to visualize...

Hey Lynn,
That is a good visual - I'm thinking something black and sexy!
Darien

I love the racecar fuel!!! Good words, Lynn.

Darien --- you will do just fine and most likely will find that you do not crave the same foods after surgery that you did before surgery. And you may find a whole new world of foods and flavors to enjoy when you fuel that little something black and sexy!!! I am anxious for your ARRIVAL!!

Hey Darien

During the Honeymoon period your going to be so excited about whats going on your not even going to think of comfort food. Then also stop and think it was COMFORT food, why did you need it? Odds are you were depressed and most of us can connect the depression to our weight. Your weight will be dropping so fast who can be depressed. Make sure you have a lot of before pictures they are very helpful later.

One last thing don't let others get in your way. This is for you and nobody else, don't let them bring you down. I would say get a code word with family members and friends. You will have episodes when you can be VERY (Anal,Explosive,Mean,Defensive) I'm sure i had more then just those but you get the gist. With the change in your body and your absorption of things you react differently B12 seems to help ALOT. This will not be apparent to you but will be to those around you. I felt they were all out to get me and i was fighting back. When my teenage kids started saying ya know dad we love you but you have been a real ass, So when they say code blue i know its me not them.

Best of luck and a speedy recovery and take the time to enjoy your new life your about to be blessed with.

Adam

Thanks for the good words!
I am feeling more relaxed now.
Adam - that code word thing is a great idea!
(I should have had one when I quit smoking!!)
Darien

Hi Darien

Gosh you can count the sleeps on one hand now!

I remember this stage. I was a little nervous and very, very excited at the same time. The last couple of weeks of waiting seemed such a looooong time. It was like a kid waiting for Christmas!

I hope all goes well for you on Thursday. I'm sure it will. At least you're well prepared as far as education goes. Anything you don't know now, you probably don't need to know hehe

We look forward to hearing about your journey once you're on the loosing side <Hey Doug! Scoot along a little will you?>

Warm wishes going your way Darien

Barbara

Hi Darien

I went through a horrible couple of weeks soon after my surgery.
I grieved over food in an overpowering way; It took me by complete surprise!
I was angry and jealous at my family and I wanted to hurt my dietitian!

At the time I never thought I would feel good again!
But thanks to the wonderful people around here and my Doctor (and even my dietitian )I have come through that period and I feel great

I never realised just how much my weight was holding me down and not just physically but mentally and emotionally.

I am not saying I never miss food, I still do occasionally but I feel so much better than I did.
The saying "Nothing ever tasted as good as slim feels!" is so true (even though I am hardly what you would call slim..........YET!)

All the best with your surgery.

Kind regards

Meg

It is so normal to feel this way before WLS. Once it is done though and the weight starts comming off all of a sudden one day you wake up and realize that FOOD is NOT in CONTROL anymore and it's a huge feeling of relief and pride. You can actually foget to eat which is something we NEVER thought possible before hand. You really do have to learn what triggers you to want comfort food and to eat when you are not hungry though. Find the triggers then work to find something to satisfy them without food. For me boredom is a big trigger. As you are able to do more you will be able to find replacements. The absolute best advice I have is to establish good habits during the first year because years later they will stick with you. Good luck and I am very excited for you.

Hi Darien! I'm so glad you posted your concerns. You have gotten many different views but they all have the same theme.....you will be so glad that you did this!

I never mourned the food. I figured that I had spent most of my adult life obese and I missed so much because of it. I never realized that until I took a real hard look at what I was never able to do physically because of my size. I will never regret having the surgery because it gave me a tool to take control not only of my eating, but it gave me time to deal with all the issues that made me obese in the first place. I am a recovering fat person and I always will be. That said, for the first time in more years than I care to admit, I truly enjoy food now. I don't miss the days of shoveling food in my mouth without tasting it. One of the most important things you will learn is to eat slowly. When you eat slowly, you actually TASTE the food and you learn to eat things that have layers of flavor so you are satisfied with so much less.

Best wishes for an uneventful surgery and a speedy recovery!

Just a thought Celadon...

You and I didn't go through the "mourning" phase. Do you think that this is because we continue to cook? I was all ready to have my mental breakdown at week 3 (this is when I was told that it would hit). I braced myself...nothing!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I am so touched by all of your wonderful responses!
Meg - I love your new photo - so pretty!
Today is my last day of work and tomorrow I start 2 days of clear liquids!
It's almost here - and it does feel like Christmas!
God bless you all - and thanks!
Darien

Darien,

I just saw that I hadn't posted on this thread.

You will do great! You are a strong woman and you will be healthy and feel better. It's a win win situation for you. If you do struggle a little after the surgery, you will work through it. You're a single mom. That takes so much strength. You have it in you. Congratulations on your soon-to-be arrival!

I have you on my WLS prayer list for the 31st.

Hi BJ,

Thanks for adding me to your prayer list!

Darien

Darien! Wow...I don't remember doing the clear liquid thing, but do remember having to take the "liquid plumber" stuff. Be sure to stay close to the bathroom if they are still requiring that little gem!

I'm just a stone's throw away! If you'd like me to be a contact or if you want a visitor, send me a PM and I'll give you my info!
Hugs!

Darien - I'm not quite where you are in the process (I hope to be authorized for surgery within the next couple of months), but I have had a similar fear. What if I still think about food all my waking hours? Will I really have energy again? That's why I love this site because so many people have gone through the same feelings, even though we think no one knows what's going on inside of us.

All the best for your surgery; we'll be looking updates!